Going on 30 . . .

I am going to be 30 this year.

Yeah.

Ouch.

I don't know why, but this seems worse to me than turning 40.

When I turn 40, I picture my life a lot more stable than it is now and like I've had, oh, ten years to settle in a bit.  30 is like, ok, you're a 'real' adult now.  Are you ready yet?  Did you have fun in your twenties?  I hope so, because now they're gone.

This is absolutely ridiculous thinking because I have been a mom since I was 22.  Been married since I was 22.  Moved all over the world and the US for the last 8 years, so I've had lots of growing experiences and things to broaden my mindset.  I have always been kind of an old soul, never really into partying, or going out, or whatever.  I like my time to myself, but I do enjoy spending time with close friends or people that make my heart happy. I know that sounds silly and sappy, but it's true.  So, I already act kind of old, so 30 shouldn't be a big deal.

Why does it feel so weird then?

I am very happy with where my life is at this point.

We are done, D O N E, having kids and it is so nice to have that feeling of completeness with our little family.  I have so many friends that are just starting their families, and that's not a bad thing, I am just super  happy to be done and moving on to the more independent stages of having  a 7 and almost 3 year old(my sweet boy will be 3 on Tuesday-look for a post on that coming soon!).

We own a house (maybe soon to be two) and have been paying our bills steadily since we've been married.  We've paid off the subaru and Adam's motorcycle(which he just sold-huge growing up step for us because it was a necessary thing to do, I promise I wasn't just being mean.) and we just paid off our credit card(the only one we had) and we don't ever plan to use it again.  We are getting to a good spot financially, even though we do want total freedom at some point, for now we are ahead of the game.

I could list more things that supposedly make us into adults, but the point is, I have been acting older than my age for some time now, so why is it hitting me so hard that I will be 30?

I know a lot of people that still act like teenagers in their 30s-not always a good thing, and I've never really acted like that, nor do I have a desire to.

I guess it's just really strange to me that I am where I thought it would take for-ev-eeeeeeeer(picture the line from the Sandlot when you read that) to get to as a kid.  Married, with kids, a house, a couple cars, a couple cats, a fish . . .

Like, we are really doing this.  This is my life.  I am a parent.  I am a wife.  I am getting old.

Woah.

Ok, now with all of that being said, I still feel so young.  I have SO much life to live and I have so many great plans and dreams still ahead of me.  I don't want this to be such a downer post, so I do want to make it clear that I know this is not the end of fun.  In fact, I truly think it's only the  beginning.

I am elated to have our two incredible kids and to be where we are at in life and have so much to still look forward to.  We've made it almost 9 years together and I'm not sick of the hubby yet, so I guess that's good. ;)

It just feels really weird to be here.

I am very thankful for every single day of my last 29 years and I SO look forward to the next 29.

I'm surprised at how quickly I seemed to get here and I hope time seems to slow down a little from now on.

How do/did you feel about turning 30???  I'd love to hear if you feel/felt as strange as me!